when I get referred to a new doctor with a long waiting list.
Peoples’ reactions when I crack my joints
Or when my body does anything abnormal…
Regardless of your inability to get anything done, being overwhelmed by fear of failure, and despite feeling beat by your illnesses that day; We should go to bed proud. Battling chronic illness is a feat within itself, fighting against it everyday proves your strength. Getting up each morning, and simply living, is an accomplishment.
If you are laying in bed chalking up the score for the day, erase it from your mind.
Because there is NOTHING easy about being sick, and you are doing an amazing job just surviving, and that in itself, is a victory in my book.
I wish people could understand what life is like for me, but then again, I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. I had a conversation awhile back, with a chronically ill friend. At the beginning of each of us getting sick, we had an unbelievable support system, and we couldn’t even spit without hitting someone who was there for us. But now, it’s almost 5 years later for me and a couple years for her, and things have changed drastically. Being sick for a long amount of time doesn’t make going through it any easier. In fact, it’s the total and complete opposite. It’s harder than we could have ever imagined. You never get “use” to being sick. You learn to live differently and adapt, but you never get “use” to this difficult, daily trial. The truth is, the longer you suffer, the more you need help from outsiders to get you through it.
Thank you so much for your kind message and words! It means a lot to me and I appreciate it. Yeah, it’s such a bummer to live in a world where people judge so easily, but hopefully someday that can change. I hope you are doing well, thanks again for your sweet words and for reading what I had to say :)
I’m so glad that my words can relate to people in all types of situations. I’ve never had an eating disorder, but I’ve watched people very close to me struggle with them, and I can only hope and pray that you can realize what a wonderful individual you are. Its tough looking fine on the outside, but dying on the inside, whether that is literally, spiritually or emotionally. I sincerely hope that you can love yourself and realize that eating disorders/self harm have no place in your life! Hang in there :)